PATRICK MCVAY

WRITER

Boston Considers Banning Hazmat Costumes

 

This is not an actual newspaper headline, but it will be when I’m mayor. You laugh and think, “Mayor? Yeah, right! Dude, you’re gonna be freakin’ President.”

What, you think I don’t know that? For crying out loud I’m reading the same voter data tables you are! (And isn’t it a great country where you can get voter data tables delivered every morning with your eggs? Try that in China.)

The truth is this: after my stint as President of the United States of America, I’m going to continue my extraordinary run in public service in smaller ways, such as by running a medium-sized US city. This will keep me in the news and allow me to express my dismay for Halloween costumes that exceed the frontiers of good taste and/or put the public’s safety at risk.

Wondering if it’s too late to announce my candidacy for Governor of Massachusetts under the Stop Ebola Now Party.

I Don't Know Everything: More Evidence
Pat's Disaster Saison
 

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Monday, 16 July 2018

Trumpian Tweetage Haiku Continuum

Russia: "nothing to

do with meddling." Why isn't

Hillary looked at?

 

The Special Counsel

Is UNCONSTITUTIONAL

I’ve done nothing wrong

 

The phony witch hunt

The soon to be released book

Looks like a big hit

 

Fake News Media

Together with the witch hunt:

My best poll numbers

 

“Caravans” coming

Must go nuclear option.

NO MORE DACA DEAL!

 

We don’t have a wall

Not going to have a country

FUND THE BORDER WALL

 

Trade Wars are good and

Easy to win. They get cute?

Don't trade; we win big!

 

Gun-adept coaches

Weapons-talented teachers

Instantly Shooting

 

Promote the Fake Book

Mentally Deranged Author

False Information

 

Now that collusion

With Russia: a total hoax

FBI/Russia

 

Kim Jong Un, I too

Have a nuclear button.

And my button works.

 

Tax cut/Reform bill

Massive Alaska Drilling

Incredible Year

 

United Nations

Sanctions on North Korea

World wants Peace, not Death

 

False Accusations.

Women I don't know. FAKE NEWS!

Collusion. Russia.

 

Army Navy Game

COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF'S TROPHY

Congratulations

 

Pelosi/Schumer

He's bad on Crime, Life, Border.

Vets. Guns. VOTE ROY MOORE!

 

Time Magazine Called

Prob'ly "Person of the Year"

I took a pass. Thanks!

 

The Christmas Story

Mother, Father, Baby Son

Jesus Christ. Bahrain.

 

Matt Lauer just fired

When will top executives

Be fired for Fake News? 

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