PATRICK MCVAY

WRITER

My Musings

This text is currently hidden by a css change. Alow's me to go directly to the category description because it is editable in the front end,

Care For Bowl of Schmacaroni And Cheese?

 

My international reputation for being terse at the water bubbler and taking all my meals in front of a computer would suggest I’m grooming myself for a sixteen-hour-a-day coding job in Silicon Valley. However, I've gotten wind of Silicon Valley's recent moves to phase out actual food. Apparently earning seven figures doesn’t mean you’re guaranteed to consume solids. (Don’t believe me; it’s in this New York Times article so it must be true).

I have a friend who once had a video editing job that allowed so little time for things like water and food breaks that he mused that the future of the industry included editing suites in which food and liquids are delivered via tubes to the mouths of editors, who are simultaneously perched on toilets such that all bodily functions and essential sustenance can be maintained without any editing downtime. Powdered, drinkable meals for employees are just the beginning of this future without chewing.

Although I don’t happen to like the whole idea of having a job that allows such little time for food consumption, I wouldn’t mind selling products to people who have such jobs. And so, piggy-backing on the schmilk and schmoylent craze, I intend to unveil Pat’s Schmoked Brisket (in powdered form).

Needless to say, my SchBelgian ales are not far behind.

Ye Little Towne Upstate
Seven Is The New Four. And The New Sixteen.
 

Comments

No comments made yet. Be the first to submit a comment
Already Registered? Login Here
Guest
Monday, 18 December 2017

Trumpian Tweetage Haiku Continuum

 

False Accusations.

Women I don't know. FAKE NEWS!

Collusion. Russia.

 

Army Navy Game

COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF'S TROPHY

Congratulations

 

Pelosi/Schumer

He's bad on Crime, Life, Border.

Vets. Guns. VOTE ROY MOORE!

 

Time Magazine Called

Prob'ly "Person of the Year"

I took a pass. Thanks!

 

The Christmas Story

Mother, Father, Baby Son

Jesus Christ. Bahrain.

 

Matt Lauer just fired

When will top executives

Be fired for Fake News? 

Subscribe To The Blog

Produce This Audio Play!

Ever wanted to produce a radio play?  Think you have the mettle?  Read on!