PATRICK MCVAY

WRITER

Catfight

Our upstairs cat is beginning to lobby for us to abandon the downstairs cat. “That damned cat has outstayed her welcome anyway!” Upstairs kitty doesn’t care that downstairs kitty was living here for years before upstairs kitty ever showed up.

This is the way it is with cats. Diplomacy is for dogs, those stupid, drooling beasts.

We’ve had to deploy peacekeepers in the neutral zones to fend off skirmishes, but it’s hard to be vigilant 24/7. We can’t post a child on the front and back stairs every minute of the day to prevent an escalation of tensions. Instead, we rely on long stretches of daytime catnaps and general feline boredom to prevent comingling. Sometimes downstairs kitty will make a secret foray into enemy territory to eat the leftovers or get a scratch behind the ears from family members. The incursion usually leads to screeches and drawn weapons.

As of this moment it’s all quiet on the western front.

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Monday, 16 July 2018

Trumpian Tweetage Haiku Continuum

Russia: "nothing to

do with meddling." Why isn't

Hillary looked at?

 

The Special Counsel

Is UNCONSTITUTIONAL

I’ve done nothing wrong

 

The phony witch hunt

The soon to be released book

Looks like a big hit

 

Fake News Media

Together with the witch hunt:

My best poll numbers

 

“Caravans” coming

Must go nuclear option.

NO MORE DACA DEAL!

 

We don’t have a wall

Not going to have a country

FUND THE BORDER WALL

 

Trade Wars are good and

Easy to win. They get cute?

Don't trade; we win big!

 

Gun-adept coaches

Weapons-talented teachers

Instantly Shooting

 

Promote the Fake Book

Mentally Deranged Author

False Information

 

Now that collusion

With Russia: a total hoax

FBI/Russia

 

Kim Jong Un, I too

Have a nuclear button.

And my button works.

 

Tax cut/Reform bill

Massive Alaska Drilling

Incredible Year

 

United Nations

Sanctions on North Korea

World wants Peace, not Death

 

False Accusations.

Women I don't know. FAKE NEWS!

Collusion. Russia.

 

Army Navy Game

COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF'S TROPHY

Congratulations

 

Pelosi/Schumer

He's bad on Crime, Life, Border.

Vets. Guns. VOTE ROY MOORE!

 

Time Magazine Called

Prob'ly "Person of the Year"

I took a pass. Thanks!

 

The Christmas Story

Mother, Father, Baby Son

Jesus Christ. Bahrain.

 

Matt Lauer just fired

When will top executives

Be fired for Fake News? 

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