It May Look Like Sleep To You, But...
I don’t like to generalize, but the fact is I’ve come to know many cats in my half century-plus of life, and I have observed that not a single one has ever worked an honest day in her life. Even cats I’ve personally vetted and given a visa to stay in my home have, by and large, taken a shockingly easy-going attitude about their responsibilities, with very little ambition or effort to give back to the community, or even wake up in the morning.
But it turns out that my two cats aren’t just lazing about for the hell of it. They are actually doing what they do 24/7 to highlight the ill-effects of a sedentary lifestyle on the health and well-being 21st century American felines: the obesity; the skittishness that results from hearing voices; the complete lack of motivation beyond the bare minimum needed to eat, use the litter box, and knock sunglasses into the toilet. What they are doing is a kind of conceptual art, the kind that requires a really talented grant writer to explain it.
Are you one of those talented grant writers? Good, I’ve got a concept for a new kind of conceptual art piece that requires me to sleep a lot. The project will take a long time, so plan to explain the large sums we’re going to ask for.
(P.S. I’m also willing to go the crowd funding route if that will let me sleep longer).