PATRICK MCVAY

WRITER

Homophonia

 

Back in the late 1980s, I worked as editorial assistant for the Boston Phoenix weekly newspaper (which you already knew from my farewell to the Phoenix blog post of some years back). The writers during my 9-month reign as mail-sorter, phone-answerer, and photo file-retriever included Mark Jurkowitz, who now publishes The Outer Banks Sentinel in Nags Head, NC, Ric Kahn, the grizzled street reporter who later worked for the Boston Globe’s City Weekly section before it was given the ax, and Scot Lehigh, who has been a Globe op-ed columnist since sometime in the 1990s. (Not to mention John Medearis and Frank Connolly.)

I hadn’t been working for more than a couple of days at the Phoenix when a call came in on the editor’s phone, which I answered. “Give me Richard,” said the voice on the other line. “It’s Shoe.”

SHoe

 

Sure it is. And I’m Perfessor Cosmo Fishhawk. I might have been a naïve 22-year old fresh out of college, but I already had to deal with myriad calls from crazies who were trying to get a few words in with the editor, and it was my job to keep them away. I wasn’t going to fall for a crank-caller claiming the same name as the cigar-smoking editor of The Treetops Tattler-Tribune, the fictional newspaper in the comic strip “Shoe.”

I asked again who was calling in case I had misheard, and this time got yelled at. “Just tell Richard it’s Shoe!” What to do? I didn’t want to seem totally gullible, but the guy did sound like he knew our editor. I informed “Shoe” that Richard was on another line, and he said that he’d hold. Richard Gaines, our editor, could see that he had a call waiting, so he asked me who it was. In my little 22-year old voice I said, “Um, Shoe?”

He took the call immediately. Soon thereafter, I discovered that I had been speaking to Jim Schuh, the beat reporter who covered crime for the Phoenix.

Homophones: sometimes they're more trouble than they're worth.  

Gate Jumper
A Nice Ride Ruined
 

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Wednesday, 19 September 2018

Trumpian Tweetage Haiku Continuum

 

 

Investigations
Republican Congressmen
Two wins now in doubt.

 

Dems love Sessions now
Same thing: lyin' James Comey
Saint-like. Really sick.

 

Russia: "nothing to
do with meddling." Why isn't
Hillary looked at?

 

The Special Counsel
Is UNCONSTITUTIONAL
I’ve done nothing wrong

 

 

The phony witch hunt

The soon to be released book
Looks like a big hit

 

Fake News Media

Together with the witch hunt:

My best poll numbers

 

“Caravans” coming

Must go nuclear option.

NO MORE DACA DEAL!

 

We don’t have a wall

Not going to have a country

FUND THE BORDER WALL

 

Trade Wars are good and

Easy to win. They get cute?

Don't trade; we win big!

 

Gun-adept coaches

Weapons-talented teachers

Instantly Shooting

 

Promote the Fake Book

Mentally Deranged Author

False Information

 

Now that collusion

With Russia: a total hoax

FBI/Russia

 

Kim Jong Un, I too

Have a nuclear button.

And my button works.

 

 

Tax cut/Reform bill

Massive Alaska Drilling

Incredible Year

 

 

United Nations

Sanctions on North Korea

World wants Peace, not Death

 

 

False Accusations.

Women I don't know. FAKE NEWS!

Collusion. Russia.

 

Army Navy Game

COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF'S TROPHY

Congratulations

 

Pelosi/Schumer

He's bad on Crime, Life, Border.

Vets. Guns. VOTE ROY MOORE!

 

 

Time Magazine Called

Prob'ly "Person of the Year"

I took a pass. Thanks!

 

The Christmas Story

Mother, Father, Baby Son

Jesus Christ. Bahrain.

 

Matt Lauer just fired

When will top executives

Be fired for Fake News? 

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