PATRICK MCVAY

WRITER

Key Issues

What is it with vacation rental landlords and their nonchalant treatment of keys? Doesn’t every burglar worth his salt immediately search under the welcome mat, atop the door jamb, or inside the grill for keys when they want to rob a place? Because that’s where they always seem to be.

I’m sure you’re not one of those people. Instead, you use a phony rock to hide your key in, except your phony rock looks surprisingly like a malformed hunk of plastic.

If I were a burglar, I’d start a movement in which burglar-friends of mine and I break into homes (with easily found keys) and instead of stealing anything, we watch an NFL game, cooking up some grub, maybe have a couple beers whilst knitting (because my burglar friends are always kitting!). Later, we crash in the beds and snore the night away without a care in the world (not that we snore).

My only question involves how to properly document this burglar-art project and save it for future generations to discover and learn from.

Frank In A Car, You're On The Air
Little Nipper
 

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Wednesday, 23 May 2018

Trumpian Tweetage Haiku Continuum

Fake News Media

Together with the witch hunt:

My best poll numbers

 

“Caravans” coming

Must go nuclear option.

NO MORE DACA DEAL!

 

We don’t have a wall

Not going to have a country

FUND THE BORDER WALL

 

Trade Wars are good and

Easy to win. They get cute?

Don't trade; we win big!

 

Gun-adept coaches

Weapons-talented teachers

Instantly Shooting

 

Promote the Fake Book

Mentally Deranged Author

False Information

 

Now that collusion

With Russia: a total hoax

FBI/Russia

 

Kim Jong Un, I too

Have a nuclear button.

And my button works.

 

Tax cut/Reform bill

Massive Alaska Drilling

Incredible Year

 

United Nations

Sanctions on North Korea

World wants Peace, not Death

 

False Accusations.

Women I don't know. FAKE NEWS!

Collusion. Russia.

 

Army Navy Game

COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF'S TROPHY

Congratulations

 

Pelosi/Schumer

He's bad on Crime, Life, Border.

Vets. Guns. VOTE ROY MOORE!

 

Time Magazine Called

Prob'ly "Person of the Year"

I took a pass. Thanks!

 

The Christmas Story

Mother, Father, Baby Son

Jesus Christ. Bahrain.

 

Matt Lauer just fired

When will top executives

Be fired for Fake News? 

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