PATRICK MCVAY

WRITER

The L Word

I was wondering recently if my kids would be loyal to me if I really needed them to be, and I’m starting to think they wouldn’t. That’s just like kids, isn’t it? Unwilling to bend the rules for dear old dad.

“You don’t want dear old dad to go to jail, do you?”

They’re about to yell “No!” and then they think: “hmmm.

Not that there’s anything I could possibly go to jail for. Heh heh. Except maybe that I dote on my kids too much. Always giving them chocolatey goodies whenever they want them (slight exaggeration). Constantly reaffirming that they are allowed all the ice cream they can eat until the end of time (which may not be so far into the future, by the way). But only as long as they are loyal.

Which is absolutely NOT a quid pro quo.

But here’s the thing: they totally can’t handle loyalty. They might take it from me, but they are not necessarily going to give it back.

In this respect, my children are like my cats.

Dead Senators
Chocolate City
 

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Tuesday, 22 May 2018

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