PATRICK MCVAY

WRITER

My Musings

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Unlucky

 

A newish pair of Lucky jeans, one of the several pairs of denim trousers I own, busted its stainless steel button closure a few weeks back. There was no theatrical “boing” sound, no comical launching of the button-part across the room; instead, there was a just a sad little bounce of the object on the carpet, and a sudden feeling that I’d lost some weight.

I found pliers to “repair” the part and fearlessly worked the rest of the day in those jeans, even as I knew there was at least an outside chance that my trousers would drop to my ankles unexpectedly, causing little old ladies to hoot and holler at me like a bunch of construction workers.

Then, just a day or two ago, the same button broke again. This time, half of it dropped into a toilet in the men’s room at work – a toilet, I should add, that bore evidence of recent use. So the question was, do I reach into the commode and retrieve my button half (then fully sanitize myself), or leave it and hope the local dry cleaner might be able to help with a new, authentic-looking button.

I opted to be cheap. While getting myself emotionally prepared to reach into the chilly, unclean public waters, I must have shifted weight a bit, and suddenly the auto-flush mechanism sent my forlorn button into the sewers of Cambridge, never to be seen again.

Farewell, button friend!

 

Honk If You Love To Park In Front Of My Driveway
To Hide And Hide Not
 

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Monday, 21 May 2018

Trumpian Tweetage Haiku Continuum

Fake News Media

Together with the witch hunt:

My best poll numbers

 

“Caravans” coming

Must go nuclear option.

NO MORE DACA DEAL!

 

We don’t have a wall

Not going to have a country

FUND THE BORDER WALL

 

Trade Wars are good and

Easy to win. They get cute?

Don't trade; we win big!

 

Gun-adept coaches

Weapons-talented teachers

Instantly Shooting

 

Promote the Fake Book

Mentally Deranged Author

False Information

 

Now that collusion

With Russia: a total hoax

FBI/Russia

 

Kim Jong Un, I too

Have a nuclear button.

And my button works.

 

Tax cut/Reform bill

Massive Alaska Drilling

Incredible Year

 

United Nations

Sanctions on North Korea

World wants Peace, not Death

 

False Accusations.

Women I don't know. FAKE NEWS!

Collusion. Russia.

 

Army Navy Game

COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF'S TROPHY

Congratulations

 

Pelosi/Schumer

He's bad on Crime, Life, Border.

Vets. Guns. VOTE ROY MOORE!

 

Time Magazine Called

Prob'ly "Person of the Year"

I took a pass. Thanks!

 

The Christmas Story

Mother, Father, Baby Son

Jesus Christ. Bahrain.

 

Matt Lauer just fired

When will top executives

Be fired for Fake News? 

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