PATRICK MCVAY

WRITER

Dark, Brooding Monday

What did Monday ever do to deserve the negative press it routinely gets? You’d think it insulted someone’s mother the way people denigrate it. Like Tuesday is so much better! Well guess what Tuesday: you’re no Friday!

Of course, Saturday laughs at the way Friday thinks it’s so cool. “Dude, most of your day is spent at work!”. Friday slinks away with a little squiggly line over its head, like a fuming comic book character. Friday is thinking, yeah, but that first beer of the weekend is the best beer of the weekend, and it happens on Friday. How ya like me now!

But don’t give Saturday that B.S. It’s well-aware that it enjoys favorite child status, with the most recent workweek firmly in the rearview mirror and the next one two days ahead.

Sunday likes to claim it owns the top spot in terms of popularity, but it fails to mention that a large portion of the world’s population wants to sleep in on Sunday but instead must drag their tired butts out of bed in order to stick them into church pews. “Rejoice!” the priests say, “For this is the day the Lord has made!” But frankly, these priests would prefer to be sleeping off their hangovers as well.

Thursdays elbow their way in with frothy tankards of ale, belching out claims that, in the 21st century, most weekends begin the day before Friday during Thursday’s Happy Hour. True, but given that you still must go to a job on Friday, all Thursday is doing is peddling headaches at work.

Not that anyone asked, but my thinking on the matter is rather conventional: Saturday is the best, followed by Friday, then Sunday, then Thursday, and from there backward until you get to Monday.

Planning to gather data to ascertain which day of the week has most global cloud cover to substantiate my assertion that God takes pleasure in raining on our Saturdays.

Why Didn't You Tell Me?
While I Slept
 

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Saturday, 24 August 2019

Trumpian Tweetage Haiku Continuum

 

 

It's unlimited
Presidential harrassment
Dems are going nuts!

 

Isn't it nice when
Countries help rebuild neighbors?
Thanks to Saudi A!

 

NBC FAKE NEWS
The Harvey Weinstein Story
Look at their license?

 

Investigations
Republican Congressmen
Two wins now in doubt.

 

Dems love Sessions now
Same thing: lyin' James Comey
Saint-like. Really sick.

 

Russia: "nothing to
do with meddling." Why isn't
Hillary looked at?

 

The Special Counsel
Is UNCONSTITUTIONAL
I’ve done nothing wrong

 

 

The phony witch hunt

The soon to be released book
Looks like a big hit

 

Fake News Media

Together with the witch hunt:

My best poll numbers

 

“Caravans” coming

Must go nuclear option.

NO MORE DACA DEAL!

 

We don’t have a wall

Not going to have a country

FUND THE BORDER WALL

 

Trade Wars are good and

Easy to win. They get cute?

Don't trade; we win big!

 

Gun-adept coaches

Weapons-talented teachers

Instantly Shooting

 

Promote the Fake Book

Mentally Deranged Author

False Information

 

Now that collusion

With Russia: a total hoax

FBI/Russia

 

Kim Jong Un, I too

Have a nuclear button.

And my button works.

 

 

Tax cut/Reform bill

Massive Alaska Drilling

Incredible Year

 

 

United Nations

Sanctions on North Korea

World wants Peace, not Death

 

 

False Accusations.

Women I don't know. FAKE NEWS!

Collusion. Russia.

 

Army Navy Game

COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF'S TROPHY

Congratulations

 

Pelosi/Schumer

He's bad on Crime, Life, Border.

Vets. Guns. VOTE ROY MOORE!

 

 

Time Magazine Called

Prob'ly "Person of the Year"

I took a pass. Thanks!

 

The Christmas Story

Mother, Father, Baby Son

Jesus Christ. Bahrain.

 

Matt Lauer just fired

When will top executives

Be fired for Fake News? 

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