Macaquetavists Unite!


Recent efforts to protest Shell Oil’s arctic drilling by paddle-wielding “kayaktavists” in Seattle tells me that not enough people are making use of activist-esque monikers. For example, with the way my dental hygienist touts the advantages of brushing and flossing, she could easily be called a Plaquetivist. Not to mentoin those Snacktivist parents out there who can’t let half an hour of play time to happen without a 15 minute snack break. But there's so much more:


  • Smacktivists: public health officials who decry the lack of heroin addiction treatment.
  • Flapjacktivists: kids who pound the table on Saturday mornings until they are fed pancakes.
  • Knick-Knacktivists: people who overpay for bric-a-brac.
  • Bric-a-bractivists: people who sell their knickknacks in yard sales to support hoarder research.
  • Clam Shacktivists: people who think you can’t get a proper clam if it isn’t sold in a broken down hut.
  • Yaktivists: People who claim that we can fuel our future on the liquefied dung of wild Tibetan yaks.
  • Unpacktivitists: You’ve gone on long trips with them, and when you return home they are too exhausted to unpack.
  • Heart Attacktivists: Start you on a statin drug as a teen so that you die of liver cancer at 65 instead of a myocardial infarction.
  • Air Sactivists: They are constantly in your face about all the cigarette smoking you did 25 years ago.
  • Roof Racktivists: Whether they are on two-week vacation or off to the hardware store, they don’t leave their roof rack at home.
  • Ice Packtivists: Decry the general lack of ice packs on hand at toddler soccer games.
  • Weed Whacktivists: Observe loudly that womens never weed whack, only mens. (Tend to be under 3 years of age).
  • Union Jacktivists: Fly the Union Jack outside their redneck homes because they think it’s actually a confederate flag.
  • Jumping Jacktivists: You can see them on TV whining that we Americas spend too much time on our asses watching TV.
  • Panic Attacktivists: First rate hyperventilators who use the technique to get us to stay in relationships with them.
  • Freddie Mactivists: People who wonder, “Why is the US Government involved in mortgages?” and so forth…


Can't tell you my own activist moniker until I register it with the US Patent Office. 



Seven Is The New Four. And The New Sixteen.


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Wednesday, 19 June 2019

Trumpian Tweetage Haiku Continuum



It's unlimited
Presidential harrassment
Dems are going nuts!


Isn't it nice when
Countries help rebuild neighbors?
Thanks to Saudi A!


The Harvey Weinstein Story
Look at their license?


Republican Congressmen
Two wins now in doubt.


Dems love Sessions now
Same thing: lyin' James Comey
Saint-like. Really sick.


Russia: "nothing to
do with meddling." Why isn't
Hillary looked at?


The Special Counsel
I’ve done nothing wrong



The phony witch hunt

The soon to be released book
Looks like a big hit


Fake News Media

Together with the witch hunt:

My best poll numbers


“Caravans” coming

Must go nuclear option.



We don’t have a wall

Not going to have a country



Trade Wars are good and

Easy to win. They get cute?

Don't trade; we win big!


Gun-adept coaches

Weapons-talented teachers

Instantly Shooting


Promote the Fake Book

Mentally Deranged Author

False Information


Now that collusion

With Russia: a total hoax



Kim Jong Un, I too

Have a nuclear button.

And my button works.



Tax cut/Reform bill

Massive Alaska Drilling

Incredible Year



United Nations

Sanctions on North Korea

World wants Peace, not Death



False Accusations.

Women I don't know. FAKE NEWS!

Collusion. Russia.


Army Navy Game





He's bad on Crime, Life, Border.




Time Magazine Called

Prob'ly "Person of the Year"

I took a pass. Thanks!


The Christmas Story

Mother, Father, Baby Son

Jesus Christ. Bahrain.


Matt Lauer just fired

When will top executives

Be fired for Fake News? 

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