No vacation to the Jersey Shore is complete without having your hand at Skee-ball. I start this post knowing little about the history of bowling’s humble cousin, but having recently encountered a bank of Skee-ball lanes in Hull, MA at one of Nantasket Beach’s old-fashioned arcades (where one of the machines stole 50 cents from me), several vivid flashbacks to my youth in upstate New York were aroused (can I say “aroused” or has Viagra trademarked that word yet?).


Skee ball in Cape Ma


A more recent visit to the southern New Jersey town of Cape May informed me that maybe I was wrong about Skee-ball in my home region of Syracuse, NY. I spent many a summer on the Jersey Shore in the greater Atlantic City area when I was a youth imprisoned by the family vacation. Maybe that’s where I first rolled a Skee-ball up a lane at an area of variously sized and located circle targets valued between 0 and 50 points (although I'm trying to verify if the target values have changed over the years).

It always helps to orient yourself relative to kitschy Americana by calling up Wikipedia or seeing if the kitschy Americana in question has its own website, and I wasn’t surprised to find that exists and is active.

Not only that, but the game was invented in Philadelphia, a Pennsylvania city that practically lies in Chris Christie’s New Jersey, and furthermore the very first national Skee-ball tournament was held in none other than Atlantic City way back in 1932. So, yeah, Skee-ball has some serious New Jersey street-cred.

As with every arcade game, Skee-ball pays out in paper tickets called scrip. Once you accumulate a million scrip, you can buy a piece of bubble gum.

Rather than waste my quarters on accumulating scrip, I hereby challenge Chris Christie to a Skee-ball tournament anywhere along the Jersey Shore. Winner gets to drop the presidential candidate of their choice into icewater via dunk tank.

Beat The Heat


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Thursday, 27 June 2019

Trumpian Tweetage Haiku Continuum



It's unlimited
Presidential harrassment
Dems are going nuts!


Isn't it nice when
Countries help rebuild neighbors?
Thanks to Saudi A!


The Harvey Weinstein Story
Look at their license?


Republican Congressmen
Two wins now in doubt.


Dems love Sessions now
Same thing: lyin' James Comey
Saint-like. Really sick.


Russia: "nothing to
do with meddling." Why isn't
Hillary looked at?


The Special Counsel
I’ve done nothing wrong



The phony witch hunt

The soon to be released book
Looks like a big hit


Fake News Media

Together with the witch hunt:

My best poll numbers


“Caravans” coming

Must go nuclear option.



We don’t have a wall

Not going to have a country



Trade Wars are good and

Easy to win. They get cute?

Don't trade; we win big!


Gun-adept coaches

Weapons-talented teachers

Instantly Shooting


Promote the Fake Book

Mentally Deranged Author

False Information


Now that collusion

With Russia: a total hoax



Kim Jong Un, I too

Have a nuclear button.

And my button works.



Tax cut/Reform bill

Massive Alaska Drilling

Incredible Year



United Nations

Sanctions on North Korea

World wants Peace, not Death



False Accusations.

Women I don't know. FAKE NEWS!

Collusion. Russia.


Army Navy Game





He's bad on Crime, Life, Border.




Time Magazine Called

Prob'ly "Person of the Year"

I took a pass. Thanks!


The Christmas Story

Mother, Father, Baby Son

Jesus Christ. Bahrain.


Matt Lauer just fired

When will top executives

Be fired for Fake News? 

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