PATRICK MCVAY

WRITER

You And Me Against The World

Public Radio’s “The Takeaway”, a newsy-talky program I avoid whenever possible, recently hyped an upcoming hour of yet more disembodied expert voices jabbering about the latest bad news by saying that the Somali Terrorist organization Al Shabaab was “thought to be on the ropes” until “they took on the world in a Kenyan Shopping Mall.” Really? They took on the world? I thought they took on a bunch of unsuspecting civilian consumers shopping for underpants. Even I can take on pregnant women and little kids in a mall if I’m well armed (which, I'm told, your average terrorist tends to be). Similarly, I can kick sand in the faces of toddlers at the beach and trip old ladies as they attempt to cross streets. I’m going to convene a panel of experts to delve into whether these rude acts of mine also qualify as taking on the world.  (But first, please remember that this website is made possible by you, and the law firm of Haughty, Mindless, and Blowhard, managing all your corporate ligitation needs). 

I suppose I should understand the conundrum for The Takeaway: with public radio having eliminated almost all programming that isn’t related to current affairs (like all those pesky hours of jazz), the shows left standing have to distinguish themselves somehow. In this atmosphere, hyperbole becomes the talk show host’s most reliable ally. Thankfully, the noise can be (mostly) elimated with a quick turn of the dial to WMBR, WERS, WZBC, and so forth.

If Al Shabaab is smart, they'll use the Takeaway quote in their promotional literature at recruiting luncheons ("We took on the world!"), forcing someone (you and me?) to air our own PSAs on Somali public radio to set the record straight (maybe during Somalia's version of the Diane Rehm Show).

Heart And Soul
I Got a Wicked Hottentot!
 

Comments

No comments made yet. Be the first to submit a comment
Already Registered? Login Here
Guest
Wednesday, 14 November 2018

Trumpian Tweetage Haiku Continuum

 

 

NBC FAKE NEWS
The Harvey Weinstein Story
Look at their license?

 

Investigations
Republican Congressmen
Two wins now in doubt.

 

Dems love Sessions now
Same thing: lyin' James Comey
Saint-like. Really sick.

 

Russia: "nothing to
do with meddling." Why isn't
Hillary looked at?

 

The Special Counsel
Is UNCONSTITUTIONAL
I’ve done nothing wrong

 

 

The phony witch hunt

The soon to be released book
Looks like a big hit

 

Fake News Media

Together with the witch hunt:

My best poll numbers

 

“Caravans” coming

Must go nuclear option.

NO MORE DACA DEAL!

 

We don’t have a wall

Not going to have a country

FUND THE BORDER WALL

 

Trade Wars are good and

Easy to win. They get cute?

Don't trade; we win big!

 

Gun-adept coaches

Weapons-talented teachers

Instantly Shooting

 

Promote the Fake Book

Mentally Deranged Author

False Information

 

Now that collusion

With Russia: a total hoax

FBI/Russia

 

Kim Jong Un, I too

Have a nuclear button.

And my button works.

 

 

Tax cut/Reform bill

Massive Alaska Drilling

Incredible Year

 

 

United Nations

Sanctions on North Korea

World wants Peace, not Death

 

 

False Accusations.

Women I don't know. FAKE NEWS!

Collusion. Russia.

 

Army Navy Game

COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF'S TROPHY

Congratulations

 

Pelosi/Schumer

He's bad on Crime, Life, Border.

Vets. Guns. VOTE ROY MOORE!

 

 

Time Magazine Called

Prob'ly "Person of the Year"

I took a pass. Thanks!

 

The Christmas Story

Mother, Father, Baby Son

Jesus Christ. Bahrain.

 

Matt Lauer just fired

When will top executives

Be fired for Fake News? 

Subscribe To The Blog

Produce This Audio Play!

Ever wanted to produce a radio play?  Think you have the mettle?  Read on!